(picture taken on Lila's 1st birthday)
My grandpa, Tom Freeman, suffered a stroke the day after Lila turned one. Oh how happy I am that he came to her party. I'm also glad that he left his hat.....it has brought Aaron comfort.
I have been to see him a number of times in the hospital and each time I go he looks progressively more peaceful. ( my grandmother and father and all others who have been there more than I will probably have a different view, but this is how I have seen it)
Tonight I took Aaron and Charlotte to see him. Charlotte was very excited and a little bit scared and Aaron was somber.
Grandpa mouthed my name when my Dad told him we were there and it warmed my heart.......... just as much as it did the first time I came to visit and he did the same.......and just as it did when my grandma Jackie mouthed "I love you too" just before she lost her battle with Cancer.
The simple act of acknowledging me and their love for me when words do not come easy...........it is so precious.
Grandpa was awake for the first time when I was visiting tonight. I always go at night when Nick can be home with the kids. It was very obvious that even though his body isn't cooperating, he knows exactly who we are and what we are saying. He squeezed my hand tight until I replaced mine with Aaron's, whose hand he continued to squeeze. Aaron stood there holding his great-grandfathers hand for a better part on 30 minutes. His little face looked concerned, but not scared. He knows where Grandpa is going. He knows he will see him again.
When it came time to leave I took back grandpa's hand, after Aaron had kissed it, and told him I had to go. He opened both eyes and tried very hard to tell me something. I looked to my dad for help understanding but neither of us could be sure. As he continued talking my heart broke for him and for me for the unreceived message. Maybe if Grandma was there she could have interpreted but she must have been getting dinner....it was 5:30.
I imagine he was telling me that he loved me and that he was proud of me ( hopefully ) and maybe giving me some advice to carry with me. Or maybe he was just asking for a kiss:) I could see in his eyes that he knew the message was lost. I promised to come back tomorrow and then kissed his forehead.
His spirit is not broken, just his body.
Stephanie pointed out that the feeling in his room is a very peaceful one. You know you are in the presence of a great man and the spirit is very strong where he is. There are many here who do not want to see him go, and many there who are anxiously awaiting his arrival.
So very loved is my Grandpa.
6 comments:
Thank you for writing this, Michele. I needed to hear more about everything so I could picture it better. We are so lucky to have him as our Grandpa.
That totally made me cry. You wrote it beautifully. He is one of the sweetest men I have ever met and I'm glad all our children have been able to meet him too.
Tom is one of the greatest men I have known and it is hard to face the fact that his time here with us is coming to an end. You did such a beautiful job of helping me visualize his last days/weeks here. It is hard to be far away. I have been thinking so much about him and compiling my thoughts for a post. He is such a blessing in our lives.
beautiful post. this made me cry.
i love you chele.
aunt mona
I too am grateful you wrote this to paint the picture of him in his hospital room. Aaron sounds so brave. We are all so blessed to have him as our grandpa and I hope we can all in our way carry on his legacy. I'm so excited to see you guys, I fly in tomorrow!
It took awhile for me to comment on these beautiful blogs you girls wrote about Grandpa. They are a comfort to me, thank you, Love you, Grandma
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